The staff tries weird soda flavors!

Colby Tortorici, Editor-in-Chief

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If you remember, a few months ago, the staff tried weird Lay’s Chips flavors! It was pretty terrible for the most part, so we decided to try it again. This time, however, we switched it up, and tried weird sodas (and other drinks, such as juices)! For this testing, we got all sorts of different drinks. We found many different brands we weren’t familiar with, with both standard flavors such as orange and raspberry, and some unfamiliar ones, such as apricot, guava, and many more terrible, terrible choices. We also got some foreign ones that we couldn’t even read; fun!

As with the Lay’s testing, we started out with a blind taste test by a few staff members, who wore blindfolds (usually jacket hoods or ones made out of newspapers because we’re tragic) and we captured their unfiltered reactions. Following this, the rest of the staff tried them, without blindfolds, and shared their thoughts on what they tasted!

The blind taste test, this time around, mostly consisted of loud gagging from the whole table almost the entire time. Save for a few tolerably okay flavors, such as huckleberry (which gave us the wonderful commentary of: “That’s grape” (Colby) “That’s not grape” (Jane)), almost all of them were terrible. The coconut water in particular was terrible, with Alissa noting, “It smells like garbage” before actually taking a drink. The coffee flavored soda, which exists because there really is pure evil in the world, was absolutely terrible. People who liked coffee hated it, people who hated coffee hated it. I think we were all sorry we agreed to a blind taste test after consuming it. Many of us has trust issues. I think a few of us almost threw up. Ithamar was seriously so close to throwing up we all got a bit scared.

After the taste test, we let everyone go around the room and try different sodas, without blindfolds! V8 Healthy Greens was a particular standout, but for being completely terrible. Jessica summed it up nicely with her thoughts on it, “I’d rather die.” Caramel macchiato soda was really just awful and had no redeeming qualities, which was something everyone agreed on. We did have a cucumber soda that didn’t receive much attention. Most people were completely neutral on it, except for Jiselt, who said she preferred it to an actual cucumber. That’s probably good… maybe? We also had a Taiwanese soda. I would say what it’s called but I really don’t know–because it was in Taiwanese Hokkien, a common Taiwanese language (We totally knew that off the top of our heads and didn’t have to look it up). It was good though! It tasted a bit like Sprite, and was enjoyable.

Overall, this taste test was very different from the previous one in the sense that almost everyone has the same opinions on most of the sodas and other drinks we tasted. Save for a few outliers, we all agreed on things. The coffee drinks (I still don’t understand why these exist), coconut water, and V8 were all hated. Prickly pear made us hate our lives a little! The Taiwanese drink was enjoyed, along with the cherry limeade drink. This taste test was super fun to partake in, although the class did enjoy the Lays test a bit more. We can’t wait to choose what we torture ourselves with next, all for the sake of the student body!

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